Parents of the Bride

Mike and Jill have been married 33 years—34 in October! They met at the University of Nebraska in an economics class that had Jill’s grade on life support. When Jill asked her Delta Gamma sister for help, she pointed Jill towards her future husband: “ask Bydalek; he’s smart as sh!t.” Mike jumped at the request to be her private tutor, and Jill (with equal measures grit and poetic justice) is now a professor of economics at the University of Nebraska at Omaha.  

Jill was born in Springfield, Nebraska, to an Irish father (Jim) and a German mother (Carol). Carol and Jim had two children: Jim and Jill. 

Mike was born in Grand Island, Nebraska, to Jack and Barbara. Grandpa Jack was a history teacher and basketball coach, and smelled of sawdust and strawberry ice cream. He had calloused, gentle hands from woodworking and beekeeping (the family kept thousands of hives!). Grace has a honeybee tattooed on her right arm in his honor. 

Barb and Jack had two children: Mike and Dave. Dave and his wife Tanya made some of Grace’s favorite people, her cousins (affectionately known as the “Other Bydaleks”). 

To Grace, Mike and Jill’s marriage smells like hazelnut coffee and a long run on a Saturday morning. They are a winning team, a united front—a picture of Christ and the church. 

Parents of the Groom

Marian and Tony have been married 43 years. They met on a blind date, arranged by Tony’s friend from NYU and Marian’s sister, Cathy. On their first date, they bonded over their shared skepticism of the institution of marriage and their disinterest in having children. Ben and Grace are grateful for their swift, tactical retreat on both of those fronts—Marian and Tony were married a year later, and had two very handsome and successful sons.

Marian was born in East Flatbush, Brooklyn, to a Sicilian father (Salvatore, after whom Ben is named) and a Neapolitan mother (Gloria), whose families passed through Ellis Island around the turn of the century. That historically unlikely union marked a lasting peace between the warring kingdoms of Sicily and Naples, roughly 650 years after the War of the Vespers (never forget). Gloria and Salvatore had four children: John, Marian, Cathy, and Annette.

Tony was born in New Rochelle, New York, to Frank and Jen, whose families immigrated in the 1920s from Campo Basso and St. Elia, two neighboring Italian towns that were, incidentally, in the Kingdom of Naples during the War of the Vespers (never forget). In time, the families pounded their swords into plowshares and formed a new family in the land of opportunity. Jen and Frank had six children: Annette, Mary Jane, Tony, Frank, Joe, and John.

Tony and Marian’s marriage is spontaneously musical, whirring with whimsy, and solid to the core.

Officiant

Jeff White has long been a Senior Pastor at Redeemer Presbyterian Church (and we mean long—he was Tim Keller’s first hire!).

Grace first met Jeff in 2019, and his approachable nature—highlighted by his earring (which Grace insisted he keep for the wedding)—left an immediate impression. In 2021-2022, Grace participated in the Gotham Fellowship under Jeff’s leadership, where he became an integral spiritual counselor, even meeting her ex-boyfriends and encouraging many breakups in the process.

Ben and Grace’s relationship began when Grace was Jeff’s teaching assistant in the Gotham Fellowship. He was Ben’s first emergency text after Grace and Ben’s initial impromptu date. Grace is now Jeff’s apprentice in ministry at Redeemer.

Jeff tends faithfully to many things: the spiritual lives of New York City couples, his wife Rebecca and their children and grandchildren, his Eagles and his garden in Harlem.

Grace’s College Friend

Emily and Grace met at the University of Michigan in Doc Piper’s vocal studio. They became fast friends in New York City after Emily invited Grace to Questioning Christianity, a series of lectures by Tim Keller, that changed Grace’s life.

They’ve shared lots of life since then—break-ups, engagements, weddings, moves, brunches, trips, and walks through the West Village commiserating about children they nannied.

Emily is a principled thinker, an Instagram meme queen and a fierce friend.

Grace’s New York Friend 

Gabby and Grace met at a Redeemer community group in 2019 (known to us as the “Redeemer Golden Age”). Both were creatives and new to the city, and became fast friends.

Though many memories surface when reflecting on their friendship (Gabby’s recent wedding, conversations about boys over sushi and Thai), the fondest are cackling on a bike ride by the Eiffel Tower and panicking about bed bugs in a Parisian hostel. 

Gabby is a low-key savage, a creative visionary and a soft place to land. 

Note Gabby’s creative genius on our invitations and website drawings!

Grace’s College Friend

Grace and Izzy met when she visited the Michigan Musical Theatre program as an admitted student, belting songs in a drug den next to the Jamaican Jerk Pit on Central Campus. Their friendship grew in NYC, where they navigated the same struggles in the theater world together.

Izzy asks questions—so many questions. The kind that prompt others to think critically and reevaluate their own positions and preconceptions. She loves hard, sometimes recklessly, and moves through life on faith, unafraid to chase what matters.

Iz is singular—an epic talent, and an OG friend.

Grace’s Cousin

If mastery takes 10,000 hours, then Lauren and Grace are grandmasters of talking on the phone. Through every birthday, heartbreak, triumph, and sanctifying New York rainstorm, she has been a source of courage, strength, and, on occasion, healthy consternation.

Lauren is a world unto herself—part artist, part philosopher, full-time wrestler with God. She’s a lover of mountains and long runs, and someone who finds poetry in pain. 

Lauren is a dedicated plant mom, a bonafide coffee snob, and a reflection of Grace’s inner monologue. 

Grace’s Cousin

Growing up, Haley was the cool cousin—the social butterfly, the sorority girl, the one with the cute hair and cool clothes—the one everyone wanted to be. But in the many years since childhood, Haley has become Grace’s role model for different reasons. Watching her stretch to fit each new phase of life has expanded Grace’s admiration for Haley, her faith in others and her faith in God’s plan. 

Haley is a master bridge-builder, an empathetic ear and now, a brave mom. 

Grace’s New York Friend

Hannah and Grace met at the Atlas Network Liberty Forum after Grace asked Deirdre McCloskey a question about free speech in the arts. Their connection deepened through a Judaism 101 Zoom class—proof that true kindred spirits always find their way back to each other.

A Yale Divinity School graduate, former CEO of America’s Future, and member of the Trump administration, Hannah is radically smart and unshakably principled. She speaks impeccably and moves through the world with poise. A fragrance connoisseur and a woman of deep creativity, she blends intellect and artistry, sophistication and sincerity.

Hannah sees people clearly, loves truth fiercely, and is sensitive to the promptings of the Holy Spirit.

Justin’s Fiancée and Grace’s Friend

Carrie and Justin, both masters under the hood and in the kitchen, are proof that God laser-cuts couples to fit. Carrie ran a mechanic shop in Montreal, crafted the best chicken parm Grace has ever had, and shakes up an espresso martini that could ruin you for all others.

A dog mom to Camber (who, naturally, has her own seat at the table), Carrie has a generous heart and an uncanny ability to notice the smallest details—turning them into thoughtful gifts. She is the rock of her family, the anchor for her brother and his son, and the kind of person you want in your corner.

Carrie laughs with abandon, loves without reservation, and holds her liquor.

Ben’s Cousin and Grace’s Friend

As Ben’s cousin, Celia is an absolute vault of information (that unlocks after a tequila shot or two). She understands the sacredness of the cousin-cousin bond—something Grace, Haley, and Lauren know well—and she brings that same depth of connection to each friendship she fosters.

She’s a traveler, a seeker, and a giver—Grace now proudly owns a Peanuts sweater for Husker football games, just one of many thoughtful gifts that prove Celia notices what matters.

Celia is a gifted musician, a free spirit and a keen observer of the world.

Ben’s Brother

Ben and Justin are brothers—blood brothers, if you can believe it. Really, they have the same parents. You can see it if you squint; it’s in the nose. Oh, and it runs through their very souls. Their canyon of common history cuts so deep you can’t see the bottom.

Justin is Ben’s model for a mind at work—always building, measuring, arranging. Bringing the chaos of the world into order. He’s eminently practical and endlessly creative. And just taste his pizza; it will change your life.

Justin is a devotee to the task at hand (whatever that happens to be). He is a dextrous drummer, an inspired photographer, and a world-class smoker of meats.

Ben’s Law School Friend

Max and Ben became fast friends at the pool table in the Harvard Law School lounge, procrastinating from their tax readings. They bonded over their intellectual rebellions against their respective zany, leftie liberal arts colleges.

Reed and Bard made Max and Ben thirst for normalcy. So, while their college classmates were making sculptures out of dung-beetle shells in East Williamsburg, Ben and Max were eating Chick-fil-A sandwiches at Federalist Society lunch talks about the non-delegation doctrine.

They’re quite happy with their life choices.

Max is a Socratic stinging fly, a loyal friend, and almost as good a pool player as Ben is.

Ben’s Redeemer Friend

Patrick is the former foster father to Ben’s cat, Stan. She misses him dearly, as you can see above. Patrick and his wife, Natalie, hosted Ben’s community group at Redeemer. They were just up the street from Ben when he lived in Brooklyn Heights.

The first time Ben met them, Natalie offered to foster Stan because Ben’s roommate, Preston, was allergic. Patrick was thereby volunteered (perhaps against his will) to be Stan’s father figure. Patrick soon grew so attached that he threatened to change the locks and keep Stan for good when Ben moved to Ann Arbor. Ben successfully negotiated her release.

Patrick is inexhaustibly generous, quietly brilliant, and surprisingly aggressive on the basketball court.

Grace’s Brother and Ben’s Friend

When Ben first met Jack (on the day Ben proposed to Grace), he felt like they had known each other all their lives. Jack has a way of putting you perfectly at ease. He’ll probably ask you an ice-breaker question like: Would you rather fight an ostrich to the death, or fight a shark—but the worst the shark could do to you is take a limb?

Ben would take his chances with the ostrich.

Jack’s investigative journalism about Helen Keller won him a prize far more prestigious than the Pulitzer—1st place in the Bydalek Powerpoint Party. Ben thanks Jack for his service.

Jack is the steward of a sensational wit, a humble heart, and a patience for puzzles that surpasses all understanding.

Ben’s Law School Roommate

John and Ben were 1L section mates, and they shared an apartment in their 2L and 3L years—which also made them COVID quarantine companions. For several months there, they may not have encountered a single other human being.

Nevertheless, their friendship persisted—deepened immeasurably, even. They walked each other past many milestones, personal and professional. They went to church together (in the flesh when they could) and John witnessed Ben’s baptism in a lake on a brisk October morning in 2020.

John’s singular rendition of In The Hall of the Mountain King, played in double time on Ben’s keyboard, regularly brought Ben to tears (of Spirit-filled joy, of course). John is a man of integrity, a towering intellect, and a pie-eater extraordinaire.

Ben’s Brooklyn Roommate

Preston was the Don of 35 Orange Street #1D, the most magnificent apartment in the best neighborhood of the greatest city on earth. Preston’s now-fiancée, Erin, found Ben on a Facebook group for Christians looking for housing in NYC, and the rest is history.

Over many late nights drinking madeira and talking politics, faith, and the future, a friendship was forged. The night before Preston proposed to Erin, Ben said to him: “The way to become a man is to make big promises and keep them.” Months later, Ben used the same line on himself when he proposed to Grace. Look at the boys now.

Preston is a professional taste-maker, an admirer of great showmen, and a follower of the Delphic maxim: know thyself.

Ben’s Gotham Prayer Partner

Kenya was something of a gatekeeper in Grace and Ben’s love story. Ben and Kenya were prayer partners in the Gotham fellowship. After many mishaps on the dating front, Ben made a solemn vow—at Kenya’s suggestion—to refrain from dating for a year. That was on January 15, 2024. (Alas.)

A mere 3 months later, when Ben and Grace realized what they had, Ben begged Kenya to release him from his pledge: “But this one is different.” The two met for prayer in a Deloitte conference room, and Kenya did what consultants do; he made a pro/con list on a white board. After some deliberation, he did what friends do; he let Ben off the hook.

Kenya is a promise keeper, a high-stakes questioner, and master in the art of friendship.

Ben’s Peace Corps Friend

The Bens are fellow travelers in more ways than either Ben can count. They served in the Peace Corps together in Burkina Faso, so their trauma bond knows no bounds. They were so deprived of protein in their villages that the Bens would regularly text each other rankings of their favorite fast-food cheeseburgers.

When they finally made it home to New York, their hangouts would always begin and end at a Shake Shack. More recently, they went on a health kick and decided to run a marathon and a half together. But going on ten years of friendship, they’re still the Bens, and they’ll be the Bens for many years to come.

Ben Boltz is a paragon of resilience, a model of self-discipline, and simply a ride-or-die.